Experiment Your Way to the Top
I was talking with a dear friend the other day and she was recounting her experience at a local indoor rock climbing establishment. She was there with some other women who she deemed more skilled than she and I heard her saying how disappointed she was in herself for not being “as good” as they were. Her thoughts around this created a less than enjoyable experience and she almost felt like a failure.
Now, I’ve been to this same place with my friend recently – a big deal for me as I am not fond of heights. I watched her clip in and start her climb with ease over and over again and remember commenting on how she looked like a female Spider Man. She’s really that good!
She was definitely suffering from a “compare/despair” mindset. I found it interesting that her first thoughts were around failing. (I personally don’t believe in failure. I believe that you keep trying until you get to where you want to be. Each step is a learning process.)
Does this ever happen to you?
A few weeks ago I heard a phrase that has stuck with me:
“Experiment. Think like a scientist. See what worked and what didn’t. Make adjustments and try again.”
No drama. No story.
So simple and yet so profound (especially for recovering perfectionists).
My friend was climbing with women whose skills she admires. So I suggested that perhaps she was hanging out with women who are at a level she aspires to reach. (This is how we get to the next level of success in anything. Hang out with people who are where you want to be.)
Hadn’t dawned on her to look at it that way.
Instead of judging her own performance what could she learn from watching them? How did they know where to put their hands? Their feet? What was their strategy to climb successfully?
And the most important question:
Were they willing to fail?
Our society is so invested in winning and achieving, so embracing failure can be a foreign thought and very difficult to relate to, especially for high striving people.
But isn’t failure about the outcome? Why are we so quick to make it about how we measure up and who we are as people?
I encourage you to think of the word fail in a completely different way:
This feels way better to me.
You?
Let’s try a little experiment of our own this month:
Look at one aspect of your life – business, fitness, money – and notice what’s working and what’s not. Do more of what’s working and stop what’s not.
Make adjustments.
No judgment.
It’s not about you.
It’s not even negative.
It just means it’s not working.
Start to experiment. Remember what Thomas A. Edison said:
“I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.”