What Are You Tolerating?

I’m a loyal person. When I find a service provider that does a good job for me, I stick with them and I’ll share their information with family and friends. I’m pretty much a dream customer.

To a fault.

I will confess I’ve stayed far too long with some personal care providers after the quality of their work declined because I didn’t want them to feel bad. Never mind that I wasn’t happy with the results. I made it mean something about me; that I should be OK with it or not be so picky.

But after each appointment, I was frustrated with the result.

I tolerated a service that wasn’t satisfying for me.

Now, this may not seem to be a big deal on the surface but stick with me.

When you tolerate things in your life that aren’t in alignment with who you are, it creates a ripple effect that spreads into other areas. You bring that energy drain with you to your work, your relationships with others and yourself.

You get used to settling for less.

So, what are you tolerating?

Here are a few categories to consider:

Clutter: Do you have areas in your home where clutter has gotten out of hand and it drives you nuts? The others you live with aren’t bothered by it, but it drains your energy each time you walk in the door. How might that be affecting your mood or how you view the world around you?

How about your email or even your mind? Are those areas so cluttered that it’s difficult to focus?

Relationships: Are you tolerating some relationships that you really need to look at more closely. Do they benefit you by being in them or is it time to close that door so a new one can open?

How about at work? What are you tolerating in that space? One of my coaching clients has been tolerating a toxic work environment for over five years and had lost the ability to see how truly dysfunctional it was until we started working together.

Do you have a team member who isn’t performing at the level necessary for their job, but you avoid having that conversation because it’s “too hard”?

Personal Care: What are you tolerating in your health? Do you find yourself having two or three glasses of wine every night because you deserve to unwind after a hard day? Do you zone out on Instagram or binge-watch shows so you can check out mentally and don’t have to think anymore?

Are you doing the things that light you up?

Finances: What are you tolerating there? Are you spending too much or not investing enough or do you go without because of your fear of never having enough?

Habits: Have you fallen into some behaviors that you know aren’t in alignment with how you want to show up? Have you lost touch with friends because of busy schedules? Do you have a few unfinished projects lying around the house?

These are questions that don’t get asked very often – heck they don’t even get thought of most of the time, right?

And – it’s so very important to be aware of what’s draining our energy so we can make changes that are needed.

Now sometimes these tolerations haven’t been around very long because, you know, life gets busy. You might be able to clear out many of them in a short timeframe and with minimum effort.

And then there are those things that have been around for a loooooooooooooooooooong time. Those are the ones you’ll want to pay close attention to because there may be a deeper meaning.

You don’t think you deserve anything better than what you’re getting.

If that’s the case, I invite you to look at that belief and challenge it. Is it really true that you don’t deserve the best life has to offer or has your Inner Critic voice taken over your brain?

(Hint: It’s your Inner Critic)

Remember: Just because you think it doesn’t make it true.

Make a list of the tolerations you have in your life and decide to rid yourself of one or two each week. Start with the small ones first so you set yourself up for success early on.

Your energy is a precious thing. Guard it fiercely.

Sometimes when you look at what needs changing it can be overwhelming and you may not know where to start. Wouldn’t it be nice to have someone in your corner to help you prioritize and manage your energy throughout this process of elimination? Well, you do my friend. Schedule a call with me today and let’s talk about what you’re tolerating and how we can work together so you can stop settling.