Episode 58: Change Your Focus, Change Your Life
Our human brains are powerful things and can be used to create an amazing life – if we know how to use them – and this is where learning how to change your focus can make a big impact.
Have you ever noticed that when you’re feeling angry about one thing, it spreads into other things? What you focus on expands and that can be helpful or hurtful.
In this week’s episode I share how even when I’m in a funk, I have a system to snap out of it.
What You’ll Learn:
- How low-value thoughts zap your energy
- My 3-step process to get you out of your funk
- The difference between making something hard and putting in effort
- The benefits of mixing up your routine
This podcast is called Create What You Crave and you can’t do that if you’re always looking at what’s missing or going wrong.
You get to create the mindset that will get you where you want to go. You get to dream bigger than ever, but only with a mindset that is centered on what’s possible for you.
Listen to the episode above or stream it on your favorite podcast app:
Schedule your Discovery Call with me today so we can craft a plan that will put you back in the driver’s seat of your career and life.
Episode 58: Change Your Focus Change Your Life (Transcript)
Hello friends. Happy to be with you. Are you ready for Spring? I sure am!
I’m going to be upfront with you on something. I’ve been in a funk for the last few weeks – just feeling low energy and not my usual bubbly self.
It’s been very gray here and there’s still snow on the ground. Will it ever melt? Ugh. I am so ready for spring to arrive I feel like I’m crawling out of my skin.
I’ve lived here my whole life and you’d think I’d be used to the long winters by now, but I think as I get older the opposite is true. I’m over it earlier and earlier each year.
I’ve also got some things happening in my personal life that are knocking me for a loop and I’m finding it really hard some days to get motivated to walk down the hallway to my home office and get to work. I just want to curl up and pull the covers over my head. And my mind chatter is mostly garbage.
What usually happens when you’re in a funk?
You focus on negative stuff, right? Well, that’s what I’ve been doing and I gotta admit, it’s exhausting.
I’d forgotten how much. I’m not usually someone who stays in a low state for extended periods of time. I have my days – usually only one – and then I’m back up and at it.
So when I saw the sun these last couple of days and felt the warmth of it on the back of my neck when I sat in the big chair in my living room reading my morning inspirational books, it was heaven.
I immediately shifted my mindset to being content and began to shed those low value thoughts that were running the narrative in my head.
Have you ever experienced this?
That was a rhetorical question and I’m sure one that didn’t need to be asked.
Of course, you’ve experienced this. You’re human and you have a human brain. Human brains are trained to focus on anything it deems might be dangerous to us in order to keep us safe.
It’s the old, “don’t go out of the cave because you might get eaten” thing but it has expanded over the centuries to include scarcity, fear, self-doubt – anything to keep you safe inside the cave.
When your brain is on auto-pilot like most human brains are, your view of the world is skewed to notice more negative things. It’s just how it works if you don’t pay attention to the narrative inside your head.
How to Change Your Focus: 3-Step Process
So how to turn this ship around?
1. Become an observer of your own thinking
Look at your thoughts and patterns from the viewpoint of someone who is just observing and taking notes – like a researcher.
There’s no right or wrong – just observations. That way we keep you out of the deep end of the shame pool.
When you’re driving, notice what your brain says about the route, other drivers, traffic, road construction.
If you’re working out, notice what your brain says about your body when you pass a mirror or can’t do the yoga pose you did 2 days ago, or aren’t breezing through your lifting routine.
When you’re in a meeting at work, notice the running dialogue you have about the length of the meeting, who is running it and how well or poorly a job they are doing, and that it’s a waste of your time.
Just notice how often your mind is focused on what is going wrong and what is missing or not being done right.
That energy can be felt even if it’s never voiced. People around you feel your vibe and they aren’t looking to hang with you when they sense that. You feel it in yourself, too.
2. Fill your day with cheerfulness and humor
Great assignment, right?
Since it’s spring, at least on the calendar, I buy fresh flowers every week. I just love them.
This week a friend gave me yellow tulips which are so very cheerful and lovely to look at. I put them in my favorite cream jug-type vase, and they sit on the island in my kitchen spreading sunshine.
Every time I go into the kitchen I smile – which shifts my energy.
I also have bright pink roses on my dining table because I received a message from my bestie who died 18 months ago that I need to get some.
They also make me smile and they warm my heart knowing who they are from.
I also have one of those bulb planters that bloom at different times that my dad bought for me over the weekend.
So, my house is full of color and flowers – and I just love it.
My spirits are lifted, and I feel so much lighter.
There is also a wealth of ways you can add humor to your day:
- TikTok videos
- YouTube
- Reels
- Stories
- Funny movies
- Netflix comedy specials
- Listening to a baby giggle – that one gets me every time. I just can’t help but burst out laughing when I hear that adorable sound
3. Become a beauty scout
Be on the lookout for anything beautiful.
Instead of noticing the litter or dirty snow or potholes, on your walk or drive to work, look at:
- Birds in the trees
- Kids at a bus stop
- A woman walking her adorable dog (that could be me and Miss Daisy Mae. She’s a prancer and oh so darling)
Do you see buds on the trees or bulbs pushing up from the dirt ready to bloom where you live?
How about noticing how blue the sky is or the puffy white clouds above your head?
Look for beauty wherever you go – train your brain – and notice what it does to your mood.
When you change your focus, you change your life
To recap, notice your thoughts, add cheerfulness/humor to each day and become a beauty scout.
This will help you create new habitual behaviors and thinking that is more suited to helping you:
- Get out of a funk and feel more like the real you
- Get what you want
You’ve heard the phrase, what you think about you bring about, well that’s completely true.
While I’ve been in this funk period, my energy is low, my appetite is hardly there but I’m craving sugar, and I focus on all the tiny little things that bug me if I let them.
And of course, I focus on all the larger things that are making me sad or frustrated or plain old pissed off.
It’s a cycle of negative spin and if you aren’t paying attention, you’ll waste a ton of time while you feel like shit.
The difference between making something hard and putting in the effort
Making the shift to focus on what you do want in your life can be very subtle, like the 3-step process I just talked about.
It takes effort and a commitment to do it every single day – all day long.
Now, your brain is going to want to tell you that’s just too hard, but don’t listen. It’s not hard at all if you follow my 3-step process.
It just takes more effort.
Noticing takes effort. Not judging yourself takes effort – a lot sometimes.
Adding cheery things and finding humor takes effort.
Tip: If your brain says you don’t have time for this, ask a teenager to send you some funny stuff. They have it at their fingertips, and it saves you time scrolling.
The benefits of mixing up your routine
This podcast is called Create What You Crave and you can’t do that if you’re always looking at what’s missing or going wrong.
You get to create the mindset that will get you where you want to go.
You get to dream bigger than ever, but only with a mindset that is centered on what’s possible for you.
We all get stuck in routines and sometimes those routines can be comforting.
My morning routine of working out and then coming home to read my inspirational books and journal is a routine that is very beneficial to me.
So is my routine of writing in my gratitude journal before I go to bed. I wouldn’t dream of not doing it. But I had to make a commitment to myself and then focus on what I wanted – and go do that. I want to feel contentment.
It’s a luxurious feeling to me and one that I can conjure up easily when I do my own 3-step process: Notice, add humor/cheerfulness and be a beauty scout.
Change Your Focus – Let’s Recap
Just these 3 simple practices that can be done anytime and anywhere – every day of the week. They can travel with you and don’t take up space in your suitcase.
When you focus on what you want, opportunities find you.
Doors that were closed begin to open again or a new door is shown to you.
The weight of the world gets brushed off your shoulders and you begin to believe in what’s possible – and yourself again.
This is the state you want to spend most of your time in. Pull up a comfy chair, make yourself a nice cup of tea, and plan to snuggle in for a long stay.
Operating from this viewpoint and feeling state is what will make all the difference in what you bring forth.
Focus on
- What’s going right
- The beauty that surrounds you
- What’s possible now and in the future.
Luxuriate in that and notice the difference it makes in every aspect of your life.
And if you want a partner in crime to help you create these new habits, I’m up for the task. Schedule your Discovery Call with me today and together we’ll plant the seeds that will bloom in just a few short months. This an excellent time to add more beauty into your world!
Until next time, remember:
I believe in you.